Grieving timetable

As an enthusiastic supporter of the Record, I read the article entitled On Being A Widow by Gwyneth Whilsmith in May. I wrote the following on January 20, 2004:
My wife of 39 years suffered two grand mal seizures in 2000. A brain tumor was detected that failed to respond to the conventional treatments. Her health progressively deteriorated but she chose to attend to her duties as church secretary at Knox, Burlington, until the day she died nine months later. Her death was a shock to all who knew her.
As I had nine months to prepare for this tragic loss, I made some key decisions that some have questioned. My minister suggested that everyone's timetable in the grieving process is different, but that it's important to get on with one's life. Only I would know the right time!
I learned quickly that my wife's friends were not my friends. My family, with some exceptions, disappeared after the funeral. I spent the following Christmas and New Year's in Scotland and Europe visiting family when I made several decisions that influenced my life.
In the fall of 2001, I was invited to have dinner only twice with a few friends and shared a meal in my home only once from September to December. Fortunately, I continued to work as a national sportscaster in Toronto, became Clerk of Session at Knox and remained active in several Masonic organizations. I derived support from my co-workers, my church and my immediate family. Some cousins maintained contact.
During the last several years of my marriage, I had become quite self-sufficient; and I never had any desire to sell my home and move elsewhere. As a sociable and gregarious type since 1956, I did not enjoy living alone as I missed the love, care and intimacy that marriage affords. After less than satisfying attempts to meet women my own age, I began to cultivate a relationship with a younger lady that my wife and I had known in a work and social situation for nearly four years. The relationship developed to a point that we became formally engaged in front of 500 people at a nightclub in Buffalo. As an active person running 35 miles per week, my wife-to-be had to focus to keep pace with my lifestyle. The former social circle disappeared.
We married in 2003 at Knox. Our guest list included family and friends who supported us. We learned much from each other in the short span of quality time we spent together. We enjoyed church activities, weekend road trips, bike rides and rock concerts. I have been able to take advantage of senior citizen prices!
We move in directions that include new adventures, new family traditions and new friends and sometimes Happy Hour. We do whatever works for us. We have “shaken the dust off our feet” and moved on.