In Malawi it is a tradition to affiliate oneself with a particular church denomination or religion. By so doing, one becomes a member of that church and is expected to participate in all religious or church activities, including worship. Of course there are some members who do not usually avail themselves during church activities or even worship. In Christian circles these are classified as “nominal Christians;” their average church attendance may be roughly once a month and they will usually show remorse when confronted. But the story of a Toronto woman is quite different: 15 years ago is when she last warmed the pew and she does not regret that decision.
I was greatly amazed when this lady openly disclosed to me that she has been absent from the church for almost 15 years, and she says she has no feelings of remorse. The lady, a grandmother of one, who opted to remain anonymous because of the nature of her job, says she does not have plans to go back to church.
She claims to have a very good Christian background composed of “very deep faith,” but later she started questioning her faith and eventually parted ways with the church. She claims that she could do all that it takes for one to be called a reliable and dedicated Christian. She recalls at one point having been offered the task of Sunday school teacher, which she turned down, as she believes it was not her calling.
The outspoken lady disclosed that there are a combination of things that led to her parting ways with the church. She raised the issue of the native people being stripped of their identity by the church and the hypocritical nature of church leaders as some of the key reasons for her losing touch with the church. She did not elaborate.
The lady in her late 50s wonders why there are so many denominations, yet they claim to preach one Christ. Prior to her stay away from church, she had been a rolling stone in terms of changing denominations. Hence she says she has lost confidence in all churches, let alone their leadership. She believes that Jesus existed as a prophet and does not buy the fact that He was God.
“I believe there is a Creator, but this Creator is not Jesus,” she said, adding: “I do not know whether this Creator is a Him or a Her, but surely I am not comfortable with the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit.”
She also accuses the church of being judgmental, hence thinks it is not a nice place for her to hang, adding that she would not advise her children to go to church unless they decide on their own. The lady claimed that there are many other people in a similar situations like hers and many others who have not even been exposed to any religion.
Regardless of her seemingly strong decision not to reconsider going back to the house of worship, she believes there is a lot to be done if the church is to change its face and reclaim its previous glory. She feels the church has to take the risk of getting outside the norm by being inclusive and innovative in order to make those who do not believe get attracted. She cites opening up to everyone who feels like using the church buildings for any social activity as one of the strategies to make unbelievers feel welcome.
She accused the church of wasting a lot of time being afraid of losing members, instead of being innovative enough to get the people to the church. “The church should stop being afraid of losing members, otherwise I foresee a continued decline,” she said.
Since she left the church, Sunday has been turned into a day for visiting friends and shopping.
