My husband was not the “strong, silent” type. He was the “loud, laughing” type and he captivated all he met, including me.
So for years, he led the parade of our lives and I followed along behind, sometimes somewhat rattled but always just a step back to pick up any of the pieces.
And there were pieces at times … business decisions that didn’t always work as perfectly as he had thought…sometimes people let him down and sometimes he needed a “mulligan” on the golf course and in his life.
But oh, it was exciting being by his side and I learned early to adapt. When he as a young RCAF LAC said “We are being posted to Germany,” I packed up my clothes, our four- month old baby and said “I am ready to go.”
But also, when I became very ill, he didn’t hesitate to speak to the Commanding Officer about a compassionate posting home. Luckily I got medical care very promptly after that.
He once bought me a house I had never seen. It had three doors … front, back and bathroom. There were no doors on the bedrooms and none on any of the cupboards or closets. It taught me to be tidy as everything was constantly on display.
But there was love in the house and the laughter of children as they played “peek-a-boo” or had “tea parties.” He was always out front leading the parade.
When cancer finally took the light out of his eyes and he died and left me to manage my life alone I was not sure how things would work out. How was I to handle the main finances? I could run the household ones so I guess I would have to learn. And I did.
The funny thing is how many times I feel he is keeping tabs on me, telling me “I’m with you all the way, you’re doing fine.”
Oh yes, I bottomed out many a time but I have found that although he is no longer leading the parade he is beside me and cheering me on.
My last words to him were to assure him I would be okay and you know, I think I am.
