It is often absolute chaos. There is a din in the background; bowls of food are going out left and right to all the tables. Over a hundred voices are singing grace on the steps and suddenly we are all crowding into the dining hall. At camp we share our meals family style, gathered around tables and serving each other. There is something profoundly special about sharing a meal with others. It is about community—about gathered presence. Throughout my time in camp and youth ministry, I cannot help but look back and marvel that sometimes the simplest of actions are the most profound.
While in camp ministry I became intrigued by a number of trends I was noticing and decided to do some research into youth culture and outreach. With increasingly technological and mobile youth, I wondered what the implications for youth ministry were going to be. I was surprised by what I found.
Sociologist Reginald Bibby conducted several comprehensive examinations of Canadian youth culture. He compared the results of his 1984 survey with those of his 2000 survey and found that the three qualities that teens valued the most had not changed. They were and remain: friendship, freedom and being loved. In a world of technology, reality television and the ability to always be plugged in, youth are still looking for a place of authenticity and belonging.
Somewhere along the lines, I think I bought into the myth that youth would want a youth group that could compete for their attention—something flashy and over the top. It turns out many youth are longing for experiences that shape their lives and offer something that the world does not—authentic community. Sometimes I wonder if we waste sacred moments in youth ministry because we want so badly for our youth to have fun that we lose sight of the fact that they are also looking for substance.
Author Kenda Creasy Dean offers a thought-provoking statement about teens and theology when she says: “Adolescents traffic in theology every day.” This theology may not be Christian and may not be conscious; in fact it may go “unheard, unnamed and unclaimed,” but the reality is they are making theological decisions daily. When they make these decisions “adolescents look to the church for a story of somebody who will save them, who will keep them from going under in the adolescent search for self—a story about who they belong to, where they come from, and what they are doing on the planet.”
It is all well and good to say these things about youth and theology but how does it work out practically? I am sure many of us have sat through those youth group nights where it is a small victory to keep people from swinging off the light fixtures, let alone have any sort of theological discussion.
I believe we sometimes undervalue the importance of a ministry of presence. If youth value friendship, freedom and being loved, often these needs are met when they know that week after week, they can come and be part of a community that welcomes them. Through these relationships we offer a way of showing them the love and grace of God as we live out the gospel together.
Talking about faith is one thing and living it together as a community is another. When we offer a safe place for youth to come and ask questions, a place where they can be themselves without the pressure of the world and be part of genuine community, it can be a transformative experience.
During my first few years of camp ministry I really thought that if I programmed everything right and had lots of excellent resources then the youth would grow spiritually and our discussions would be deep and life changing. Do not get me wrong, these things are important; but often our deepest theological discussions and questions would happen while we were making pizza for supper or roasting marshmallows over a campfire.
Do not doubt your ability to lead youth just because you do not have the largest group or most outrageous activities. We should not underestimate the power of authentic relationships in a welcoming community. Jesus formed his disciples while walking with them through towns, through the countryside and sometimes even on boats—the key was that he walked with them. Jesus was present, answered their questions, was patient when they were difficult and loved them for who they were. It was both simple and life changing for them. Sometimes the best conversations and questions about faith happen over pizza dough without any glitz or glamour—just a gathered community that cares about each other.
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