It has come as a bit of a revelation but along with all the other titles I have owned…daughter, sister, sweetheart, fiancée, wife, mother, grandmother and great-grandmother I have another one…”single mom.”
I know most people associate that label with young women but since the death of Harry I too have become a “single mom” along with all the negatives that sometimes entails…for life goes on and the “mother” in you continues no matter how old your children are.
In my bedroom are pictures of my “babies” at two and four years. Their faces may have changed but they are still the tiny sweethearts I kissed and cuddled. And there are still similar problems in their lives.
The food I feed them is not found in tiny jars; more so now, than when they were tiny, it is patience, understanding, compassion and concern that I feed them. I dress them with my prayers every day and sometimes I share their tears and certainly I share their joys…but now I do it all alone. It is a big job and there are many times I have wished Harry were here to give me a word of wisdom. I have to rely on my heavenly Father to fill in the empty spaces.
Friends are great but you can’t share everything with them. God is always present and his comfort is ever near. We rejoice together when things are going well and He reminds me that He will not forsake me when I feel helpless and unable to change things for these children of mine that are now housed in older bodies, but still the little ones I once held on my knee.
I realize that young mothers have dozens of problems that I have never faced alone, but as a senior mother alone, I now am expected to continue my role as all wise and all knowing…and all able. The last named one has changed as I walked around with a cane half of last year…they are learning that although my love will never change, I am changing…and I am recognizing that the roles we once played will gradually change also and down the road I may well be the one that needs “mothering.”
