In the Fall of 2006 after nearly 14 years as a priest…I could do it no more. I left to live at L’Arche Daybreak in Richmond Hill, ON among people with developmental disabilities. That November I went on an eight day silent retreat at the Jesuit retreat house in Guelph, ON to discern my future. While I was there I was captivated by this incredible sculpture of St. Ignatius, the founder of the Jesuits. Each day at different times of the day I would walk around the sculpture or sit in front of the glass doors looking out. I watched Ignatius “leaning in” with his hand over his heart. I wondered if Ignatius had ever weathered storms in his life. I wondered why when most of the time our natural instinct is to lean back in the face of adversity…Ignatius seemed to be leaning in. Was he searching for the whispers of God? Was he listening for the musings of the Spirit? Was he yearning for echoes of stories of Jesus? Why lean in? Maybe, to hear the echo of the story of Sara and Abraham to lean in and strike out with the Caravan following god’s promise of blessing. Maybe, to hear the stories of Mary and Joseph lean in to the promise of the Angel to fear not and believe in their goodness in the great story unraveling around them. Do we lean in? Do we in the midst of adversity want to turn and run, to give up, to let go? Or do we lean in and listen and believe? I did…and today I am a minister with the United church of Canada …God surely has a sense of humour. But by leaning in and listening to my heart and what was in the winds swirling around me…I have been blessed and am where I believe God needs me.
And we pray…
Holy one…when the winds of change, of dissent, of fear swirl around us,
Help us to lean in and trust in your voice. Amen!
