Please pray for all those facing last days of life with their own unfinished business and personal flare!
Turtle Shell Man
Turtle shell man
Stuck in that sweaty hard shell for support
Can’t sit up in bed without it, “No life…”
He invites me to pull the pain meds out of that crammed drawer beside him.
But the gun’s been added to the drawer
“I know I could end it all if I wanted to”, he announces.
Eyes lock in awkward silence.
Listening negotiates the bullets away.
The gun stays by his side, symbol of the daily choice to survive.
His brother gave him the beloved family revolver –
He feels loved by the gesture, without pulling the trigger.
The turtle shell confines the stories
of a life well lived by this man- becoming- friend
on multiple pain-filled visits.
The next visit explains his invention for mice to get out of his basement –
A pride in innovation cracks the shell momentarily.
“Go to the top of the stairs off the kitchen”, he proclaims.
Mouse gets on pulley system to activate levers and ramps to freedom.
“Can’t be trapped, you see…”
But the trap this time is cancer
Eating away the spine,
Living room hospital bed – all exposed – no escape –
Except death.
A daily request for one bullet makes his wife squirm
37 years of devotion…
Eyes of her heart remembering the untrapped man –
Father, lover, engineer, fly fisherman.
17 days later, death brings longed- for relief
No more shell necessary,
No longer trapped by pain and tumor load.
Stories are forever freed, along with the man.
Shell signed with memories and love
at services to remember Bill.
Wife memorizes stories and defiantly throws away shell,
An unwelcome reminder of a very thin slice of confined life.
No longer trapped, Bill stands tall.
