It was an incredible day…it was my first covenanting service as a United Church minister with Dunbarton-Fairport United church. A friend and colleague of mine Michelle from Westminister United preached. It was significant for me to have a woman preach (always promoting women as priests in the RC church) and also that she came from the church who welcomed me into the United church.
Michelle in her sermon told the wonderful story of baptizing a young three year old child and how when it came time for her to pour the water the child leaned in to the water with a huge smile on her face. At that point I lost it and had tears streaming down my face. Michelle had no idea she had connected into a deep spiritual turning point in my life just a few years back.
I flashed back to this picture above which is a beautiful sculpture of St. Ignatius of Loyola which sits in the courtyard of the Jesuit retreat centre in Guelph, Ontario. It was the fall of 2006, I had left active ministry to discern my future priesthood and was on an eight day silent retreat. I journalled, I prayed, I walked, I met with a spiritual director, I took pictures and every day I sat in front of that sculpture from many different angles.
It was a powerful sculpture in that the artist had St. Ignatius grabbing his cloak over his heart and leaning into the wind. I was moved by this and challenged by it and by the end of the retreat had made my decision quite peacefully to leave priesthood and walk, clutching my robe of faith and walking into whatever life would open up to me. It was a leaning into the baptismal water, hearing God’s words…this is my beloved son.
I am not sure if Michelle could see the tears…but as she continued on she encouraged me to lean in and feel God’s love and the love of the congregation. What a powerful connection she had made. They are words I have kept with me and embrace with courage. I have had those moments in ministry both as a priest and as a United church minister where I have reminded myself to “lean in” and trust and love and be loved.
So as we begin this Saturday morning…I encourage you to “lean in” and embrace the day and all it holds. To “lean in” with faith, to “lean in” and feel God’s love, to “lean in” and love others even when it is difficult”.
And so I offer this prayer:
O Holy One,
You have leaned in and poured water on me,
speaking words of love and smiling upon me.
May I lean in to this day and embrace it with faith.
I make this prayer with an open heart. Amen!
