I am not a retreat kind of a person. At least, that is what I thought before my recent experience at the Presbyterian Women's Weekend Retreat at Camp Kannawin. Located on Sylvan Lake in central Alberta this retreat gave me a safe and beautiful environment to explore my own spirituality. I learned how to express my faith and it helped me find ways to incorporate worship into my daily life. The theme was taken from Psalm 103:1: “Bless the Lord, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name.” By looking at my gifts and then exploring new avenues for personal and congregational worship, I finally understood that by engaging in active worship on a daily basis, I can inspire others.
Our spiritual guide, Rev. Helen Smith, said the purpose of the retreat was to provide a chance “to get away, try something new and different in an environment of peace, to be able to reflect on the presence of God in our lives.” She used a quilt as a metaphor for the importance of spirituality; the binding represents the horizontal relationships we have with friends and family, while the stuffing represents the vertical relationship we have with God; it fills us and gives us shape. Lois Snider-Norby worked with Rev. Helen to develop the weekend program. She emphasized the opportunity for the women to “renew, refresh and re-centre” by leaving free time between sessions for individual reflection and chances to connect with other participants. Lois indicated that this is an important part of the experience because by sharing with others, we can learn from their experiences.
I have never been overtly Christian. I have always believed, but I never took ownership of my faith. This retreat gave me the chance to look inward and discover the power that I had within me. After I spent time in the Spirituality Centre, where I travelled through the Labyrinth with no great inspiration, I took some of the study sheets to the outdoor chapel. It was one of our beautiful spring days where the blue sky stretched forever. From the chapel, I could hear the wind in the trees and the sound of the water hitting rocks on the shore. I stopped and just drank it all in. Suddenly, I had the feeling that I had to act, so I started pulling weeds from around the cross. It was there, on my knees that I felt God's presence. I also realized that the restlessness I have been feeling for a long time was Him all along. Now that I have acknowledged Him, I have a calmness I have never felt before. The atmosphere at the retreat gave me the chance to be still long enough to let God speak to me. Luckily, because I was at camp, I had people near me who understood how I felt and were thrilled to share the experience with me.
When I got home, I shared this incredible experience with my minister, Rev. Fiona Wilkinson. In her experiences, she has found that “women who can openly show faith have a big impact on younger women.” I now feel more comfortable in expressing my own faith. It did have a big impact on me. This inter-generational connection was apparent at our retreat. At the beginning, we tended to gravitate towards other women our own age, but by the end, most of us felt like we were 12-years-old so it did not matter.
Because of the retreat, I have a new perspective on worship styles. It provided an opportunity for me to compare worship styles not only between large and small churches or urban and rural locations, but also between the young and old. It was interesting to talk about how to incorporate traditional and contemporary aspects into congregational worship. It was also interesting to learn how many older women want contemporary aspects of worship while some younger ones want to maintain tradition.
The goal of a retreat, of course, is not to find the one answer, but to share ideas to try in individual congregations. These new ideas help women in their leadership roles in their churches and communities. I know I have come back physically, emotionally and spiritually rested and ready to serve and bless His holy name.
