July 10, 2002
And there it is, our little blue house. Home at last. We settle in and everything is familiar and I feel safe.
Harry is very self-conscious about the drain in his neck but we assume that will be gone soon. Eating is still difficult but he manages a soft sandwich, washing it down with lots of fluids.
Later that week, I took him to emergency as I was concerned about a low grade fever. They assured me he was fine but he was so tense they gave his some “relaxation” pills. I perhaps needed them more than he did.
He’s had a couple of bad nights and had to get up and take pain medication. He doesn’t feel the pain during the day but his right shoulder really bothers him at night.
We’ve had lots of company. Everyone is so kind and concerned. His golfing buddy was over with flowers and I think he was really shocked. I don’t think he realized how serious this whole thing is. When he arrived we were sitting out in the back yard under the birch tree, having a cup of tea. Certainly it was not the vibrant, golf enthusiast that he was used to, but one that still greeted him with a big lop-sided smile.
Daughter Robin popped by for a visit. She is such good therapy for Harry. She chatters away about her cat and makes us see that beyond the hospital walls life still goes on. She and our Lyn are such a blessing to us.
The home care nurse comes each day to check Harry’s drain and answer any questions. They are a God-send.
We’ll see our own Dr.P. on Friday and get a few more answers to our concerns. He’s seen Harry through so much … a heart attack, diabetes and now this.
We have to be back in Edmonton on the 16th and hope to hear that the radiation treatments are lined up. It is a constant “waiting” game.
Harry has lost about eight pounds and his diabetes is just controlled. Anyway it is a beautiful day. God is faithful and is watching over us.
* * *
Next morning…
Harry got his drain out. These medical procedures are sometimes a bit gross but although he’s uncomfortable he never complains. I am discovering that even after so many years of marriage I am still finding out new things about this man of mine. I am so proud of him.
* * *
July 11, 2002
We finally have some dates. Appointments are booked for August 19 and 20, then he starts radiation three weeks later. Our whole lives are focused on his cancer and everything revolves around his appointments on the calendar.
Harry is on pain medication today but seems a bit more like himself. Our old friends came by and we had a nice visit. What precious things old friends are.
We had a horrendous electrical storm last night. We watched it together. In earlier years they made Harry uncomfortable but I have always been awed by the majesty of God in such a display. It made us both feel His presence in His world and in our lives.
* * *
July 14, 2002
We went to church this morning. There were lots of hugs and good wishes. Birthday brunch was served afterwards but we came home before the cake. Harry was very tired.
He’s on quite a bit of pain medication. I hate filling him up with drugs but I can’t stand to see him hurting.
* * *
July 17, 2002
We saw the surgeon in Edmonton on Tuesday and great news! There was no cancer in the lymph nodes and other things he removed for the biopsy.
All those prayers God listened to … Thank you Lord.
We finally have our first full night’s sleep since his dental extraction back in June.
* * *
July 28, 2002
They’ve booked another appointment in Edmonton for August 19, then radiation in September. Wish it had been earlier as I am concerned about travelling back home in late October when the weather is unpredictable; but we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
Harry is finally off pain medication. He gets an awful twinge in his ear and jaw when he first bites into something or takes a drink. His diabetes is all screwy and he had to adjust his medication. Hope it regulates itself. We often take two walks a day to keep it under control.
His mouth is somewhat distorted but his scar is not too obvious. He is finally able to shave but says his earlobe and the right side of his jaw are numb.
* * *
August 19, 2002
Our oncologist said the surgeon had removed a bit of cancer! I was so sure that there was none left. At times I feel like a yoyo … up one minute and down the next.
* * *
August 21, 2002
There are such great people at the Cross Cancer Clinic. Our anxiety level drops as soon as we see them.
We had a nice visit with Lyn and grandchildren Mike and Andrea. Those kids add so much sunshine to our lives.
* * *
August 29, 2002
Radiation is set from September 17 to October 29. A one-room suite is booked for us to stay in. I have packed some of the things we will need so I can make it “homey.” There has to be a haven to come back to when Harry’s treatment is done each day.
I am somewhat depressed. I know everything is okay but wonder what will fall on us next. This is a time of testing. Yet in all this I thank God and count our blessings. Harry is getting help and hopefully we will beat this. He has not forsaken us … but I must admit I’m on a bit of a downer right now.
